Wayneisms

Now, I don't know if you're like me and have a father who is verbally challanged, but I would like to introduce you to what I'd like to refer to as WAYNEISMS. Now since I may be inclined to post these little nuggets of gold from time to time I am going to give you a classic example......

Wayne: That trailer for that Sandra Bullock movie is on..
Me:  Okay, dad..
Wayne: See she can see into the future, she's having one of those prepositions.
Me: (Giving dad a what the heck look) You mean a premonition right or is she about to do some English?
Wayne: Oh you know what I meant.

 Definition:

Wayneism: wayne-is-ms :When one mistakes one word for another or uses wrong word in place of another. Can also refer to saying nonexisting words, or inaccurate phrases. Conversation usually ends in "Oh you know what I meant."


****UPDATE****

You might also be prone to using wayneisms when you look like this:

PS: this is the cure for double vision--find your grandsons toy eye patch and and place gently over your left eye.

 

***disclaimer: this is only a temporary cure, if you are truly having double vision please seek medical attention otherwise people might think your brain had a wayneism***